Views : 189,104
Genre: Music
Date of upload: Jun 6, 2017 ^^
Rating : 4.96 (31/3,036 LTDR)
RYD date created : 2022-01-21T19:35:24.181353Z
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Top Comments of this video!! :3
damn. I remember listening to this on repeat back in the days I thought I would die because of my ed. I forgot all about these songs.
but. here I am. alive, and happy, believe it or not.
you're going to make it through this. you have to, please. because we need you so much more than this fucking disease, I promise.
66 |
I ate some food today. I thought it would help. It didnât. I could feel it sloshing around in my stomach, and I gained four pounds since this morning. I felt horrible. I tried to throw up but it didnât work. Now I feel even worse because Iâm nauseous and guilty and I just wish I didnât eat.
188 |
I know iâm thin. Everyone keep saying this âyouâre underweightâbut i just canât.
Sometimes i feel like everythings gonna be great and i will have a great life in the future.
But then somethings happen. I go to school. I take low point in my exam or i feel lonely and sit alone in the lunch. I know these are not so bad things. But I just canât take these feelings. So i starve myself to the death.
lol Iâm so paethetic
edit: i wrote this a year ago. im much more better now. but still these songs or even a slightly thing related to anorexia triggering me so badly. cause for a long time anorexia felt like home and sometimes i wanna go back to it. it was just an escape from reality, from my loneliness.
149 |
Within the first months of 2020 I was eating healthy and losing weight the right way, then I relapsed and started restricting, skipping meals, and purging.Then quarantine happened, I started bingeing nonstop for over a month straight, and now Im going back into restricting, and this just made me want to cry. Im tired of living like this, but I want to lose weight, I want to be healthy, but I can't do it healthily for more than a few months. Not to mention any health habits are completely eradicated by my family. At this point Im willing to give in till I reach my goal weight then I will recover. ( Please do not do this try to seek help, and please no one comment how horrible this is I know it is, ED don't make you think or act logically). Stay safe loves, and if you read this you must eat something. <3
25 |
I'm so fucking proud of you! I've been following you since you were in that music school. Not only are your lyrics so real, but your musical ability astonished me. I remember some of these when you just put them up......you already have 3 albums, I didn't think it had been that long, but I'm DEFINITELY buying them now that you got 'em. Thank you for reflecting our pain so beautifully.
7 |
You make this all so poetic in your music without eliminating the struggle and horror one faces in these instances. It's so eerie and beautiful, but feels dangerous. It is the black ebb and flow of the waves at high tide, promising a fun midnight swim while waiting to serve you a slow, lonely death.
2 |
@hopex8302
4 years ago
I just don't want to recover
312 |