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Genre: People & Blogs
Date of upload: Jan 16, 2024 ^^
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YouTube Comments - 48 Comments
Top Comments of this video!! :3
I think anxiety stems from a childhood where you felt unsafe due to a dysfunctional family system within a bigger dysfunctional society at large. Volatile, unpredictable parenting, moving around a lot, all these things put me in a hyper sensitive anxious state, always waiting for the bad thing to happen
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You probably hear this all the time: All of your videos, ideas, and life stories, are relatable, for me. New to the realization of autism+ADHD, I just felt alone, and itās a mild relief, to know that others had/have the same obstacles.
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One time I encountered my hairdresser in a pub near my home, and because I had been going to that hairdresserās for several years he instantly recognized me but I had no clue who he was. We had a chat and pretended I knew him. Days later I went to get a haircut like always but I didnāt make the connection. I found him again in the pub, we had another quick chat while still not knowing who he was. This happened at least 4 times over the course of several months until finally he mentioned the pub while giving me a haircut, then I connected the dots and thought āwait a second, they are the same person?ā.
This kind of situation happens to me all the time, but this one is the most stupid.
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I particularly struggle with faces when I see someone away from where I usually see them or if I haven't seen them for a long time. it takes me a long time to "learn" a face and I'm amazed at how readily many people can recognise someone they haven't seen for years or even decades. As you mentioned I also find it hard to tell certain people apart even though they seem obviously different to others. The same hair colour and style can leave me confused even when the faces are very different.
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I make faces when I'm reading š when people see me they say "wow, must be a really exciting book" and I literally had no idea I was making a face---nothing to do with the story or anything, it's just stimming.
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I was totally distracted by your cute cat the entire video! You've put words to my experience that I haven't been able to figure out myself. It's nice to feel validated too by your experiences you share on here too.
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Oh my God! Your explanation of social imagination and your experience of it has hit me like a bus. For me, it's almost like I'm doing everything for the first time every day. Like, I've made specific journeys or gone to the shops or visited friends hundreds if not thousands of times in my life, but every time I feel just as fresh and vulnerable to the situation as if I hadn't done it before. I can rationalise that I've done it before but that doesn't actually matter when I can't conceptualise all the different things that could possibly happen. I'll also script and plan everything but ultimately still feel incredibly on edge because I know that I'll need to process and react to brand new things on the fly when it actually happens. Love your videos!
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thank you for talking about "autistic facial features" and the small scale studies. I feel like anything that's pop culture-y about facial features tend to go down a racism hole real quick so š„²
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As an autistic person whose special interest is Doctor Who, I found your comment about face blindness to be super relatable lol. I have a hard time remembering certain events from my actual life (including names and faces sometimes), but no issue remembering insane amount of details about DW lol.. But I think it's just because of how special interests work. Like, I usually watch or read about/research DW when I have my "down time", so there's less anxiety and confusion involved, compared to when I'm around other people. I think it's just easier to process and remember things when we can actually learn them calmly, plus it's always easier when we're genuinely interested in the topic. That's just my theory though, I'm also late-diagnosed and still learning everything myself.
Also for what it's worth, I love your accent! :)
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On interoception, coworkers involuntarily watch me, and bring me water, because I never take water breaks. I typically eat, not because Iām hungry, but because I think I might be hungry, later. I canāt always tell if I need the bathroom, so I usually say, āIād better go try to pee, just in caseā. I had noticed that other people donāt do any of those things, but had no idea it was this.
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I've been hearing about interoception from various online autistic people but I didn't realize it could be as simple as THAT---you mean it's just not having to pee until you have to pee? I remember in kindergarten specifically but also the years after, I would be sort of known for doing the "I have to pee" dance without realizing it. Of course as I got older I got more self-conscious and stopped doing the dance, and just got really good at holding it until class was over. Would never have occurred to me to go before class because I just wouldn't feel it.
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I love your cat.
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I have the interception and face-blindness. When I meet people for the first time, I warn them that I'm bad with names and faces, and that I probably won't recognize them for awhile. My gaming group gets a big laugh out of it when I misremember a person's name or face. I'm just grateful that they don't take offence!
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I think I have some degree of face blindness, because when I went to my sister's wedding my aunt (who I hate for various reasons) said goodbye to me before she left, but because she was wearing contact lenses instead of her usual glasses I had no clue who she was, so I was like, "Bye, whoever you are."
I also used to get Hugh Grant and Colin Firth mixed up sometimes.
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I suffer from face blindness. I can be talking to someone and then afterwards I know I was talking to that person but if you ask me to describe their facial features I can't remember what they look like.
I also have no long term memory too. I can't remember my past. I think it is called SDAM, severe deficit autobiographical memory. I can't remember my childhood or my early adulthood. Flipping heck I can't remember what I was doing last week. It is all a total blank. I mean I can tell you names, places and so on but ask me to give a running commentary on what happened day to day I can't do it. It is why I started to keep a journal because I know I will forget what I did in a few days.
I also struggle with my sleep/wake routine. I have tried to stick to a routine but I just can't do it. One week I can be awake at 7am the next week I am like getting up at 3pm then the week after that 8pm until I am waking up again at 7am.
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While it's not quite the same as echolalia certain words and phrases - often from TV and film - stick in my mind. When I'm alone I'll sometimes say them out loud almost like a stim. Occasionally I try to drop them subtly into a conversation, discussion or online comment - it can be satisfying just to do this but even more so if someone recognises their source and you know you've met a fellow fan.
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First time I hear of social imagination. It describes perfectly what I experience. During interactions I'm focused on what to pay attention to and my responses, and I can really enjoy it. Afterwards I can feel good for a while and look forward to next time. But after a while I forget what it was like and I can't help but be anxious when trying to imagine the next interaction.
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This is the first time I have heard "social imagination". I have always known that I have a hard time wrapping my head around things when they go sideways. I found out not long ago that everyone doesn't do an internal audit for all potential possibilities that may occur in the outside world.
I find it really interesting that it is common to have face blindness. I'm on the opposite end as I have a really good ability to remember faces, but I have total aphantasia. I also have an internal music player that I used to just think was constant earworms until I found out I could control it. I wish there was a database for the lesser known traits to see how fringe some of them are.
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omg yes i often forget to eat mostly when Iām at home and thereās no strict routine.
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@Intensive_Porpoises
3 months ago
The way I thought about social imagination is: I don't have the ability to make stuff up 'on the fly'. As long as something goes according to plan, I'm good.. but as soon as something deviates from the usual, I have to stop and make a new plan even if it's just a temporary one to get to some more comfortable place where I can make a more detailed plan. It's extreme lack of spontaneity. This is why social interaction is so stressful. Social interaction has a HUGE number of variables! so it's impossible to know what to expect and formulate a plan for it. The more variables there are, the more anxious I am. Talking to people about concrete subjects is much easier because a large number of variables have been removed from the interaction.
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