NEW TOUR FALL 2010 tickets here: tinyurl.com/2a3labw

my new CD, "words, words, words," is here: itunes.apple.com/us/album/words-words-words-deluxe…

the opening joke is based off of a jim gaffigan joke (i apologize i meant to acredit him) thank you for you criticism. once again i apologize, EVERYTHING else is original

lyrics below
"beat" and lyrics by bo burnham

Yo i dont got bros, dont hang on the streets
i dont beat my hos, i only beat my meat.
Dont womanize cause you no its true
that when you look in thier eyes you see thier people too
Mother effin suffrage!
You know im a gangsta, you know i do coke,
but i had to go to diet, cause it burnt my throat.
Ive been doin drive-bys all of my life,
cept the bullets are newspapers, the car is my bike.

3.14 apple pi,
i whip, clean it off, and stick it in her eye.
and by "it" i mean contact lense
3.14 apple pi,
I got rhymes and flows that make hitler cry.
George bush wont he jsut yell and rant
but hes a presiDONT who ameriCANT

I spit gangsta hymns, cause i'm a gangsta straight,
I think of 20 inch rims when i masterbate.
We're gonna be late, theres no time to waste,
cause the girls that i date, have a particular taste.
the taste of my weiner! (snap)

3.14 apple pi why was i born white no one quite knows why,
Gansgsta sell their rocks, ive got a collection
You couldnt get a rise out of a yeast infection.

I'm a lyrical heretic, but i'll make you laugh
hit with you rhetoric, then i'll cut you in half.
dont need to be a clown, i dont need to be nice,
How bout you sit down, and i serve you slice...

of my 3.14 apple pi my voice is so smokey itll make you high...
Heres a confession its all about me,
Heres my impression of a broken jet ski.

Here come the puns.
All yo little thugs wanna mess me with me?
know that ive been doin drugs since the age of 3.
I took my ceral, stabbed it open with a knife.
Snorted that shit and i got high on Life.
A guy asked me for change, saying my mind was too dense.
I said you wont make cents if you dont make sense.
big finale...

you know i flow and show it, you know that bo know it,
Youre lawn i'll mow it and grow it cause he's a sho' poet.
Yo my rims be spinning i winning, like adam i be sinning.
Potato skinnnin and knittin and separate those linens.
And in my eyes you see flies, and though you people tries
Just to disguise all your lies, but baby i be wise.
you know i did it and shit it you brothers couldnt hit it,
Then you try to ride it, too late! i already spit it.

apple pi

copyright boburnham