Buy the season 4 album here:
lnk.to/ceg4 JAP Battle (Reprise)
Starring Rachel Bloom & Rachel Grate
Written by Adam Schlesinger, Zach Sherwin, Jack Dolgen & Rachel Bloom
Audra:
ALL OF OUR LIVES YOU WERE TOXIC
OBNOXIOUS
NOW THOUGH, YOUâVE BROUGHT ME FROM NAUSEOUS TO NACHES
IâM PROUD OF YOU, BUNCH
YOUâRE A GROWN-UP, YOU GOT THIS
KOL HAKAVOD, YOUâRE A GODDESS
Rebecca:
ME?!
BUT YOUâRE SO RESPONSIBLE
CAREERâS ON SIZZLE
HUSBAND, DITTO
THREE GREAT KIDDOS
YOUâVE GOT COMPETENCE, CLASS
PLUS A SKINNY-ASS WAIST
AND A TONED-ASS ASS
Audra:
WELL, YOUâVE GOT A FREE SPIRIT, WHICH I SEE AND COMMEND
SO, LIKE 2 CHAINZ WITHOUT THE âNZâ AT THE END
I WISH YOU DOUBLE CHAI
FOR FOLLOWING THE TUG
OF THE HEART BEHIND YOUR 36 TRIPLE-D JUGS
Rebecca:
WOW, WHAT A BOOST FOR MY CONFIDENCE!
Audra:
YEAH, I MEAN, I GOTTA GIVE IT UP
IâM PRETTY GOOD AT GIVING COMPLIMENTS
Rebecca:
NICE BUBBLE, BUBBELEH, I REALLY HATE TO POP IT
BUT NOBODYâS GOT A PLAUDIT ANY HOTTER THAN I DROP IT
Audra & Rebecca:
THIS ISâŚ
Audra:
A JAP PRAISE FIGHT
Audra & Rebecca:
HALF AFFIRMATION
Rebecca:
HALF CAGE FIGHT
Audra & Rebecca:
KILLING YOU WITH KINDNESS
Audra:
YEAH, YOUâRE DANG RIGHT
Audra & Rebecca:
ITâS A HEAD-TO-HEAD YASHER KOACH MAZEL TOV OFF
Rebecca:
YOU KNOW WHAT?
LETâS SQUASH IT, YOUâRE AWESOME
Audra:
SECONDED! SAME!
REBECCA-WISE, MY GAME RECOGNIZE GAME
Rebecca:
THANKS, I APPRECIATE THAT
Audra:
YEAH, I MEAN, THEREâS A REASON IâM CALLED âESTEEM QUEEN LEVINEâ
Rebecca:
CAN IT WITH THE ACCOLADES-SLASH-SHADE-CATAPULTING
YOU ARE THE ONE WHO IS GREAT AT ADULTING
ALL YOUR HARD WORK, ULTIMATELY RESULTING IN TRIUMPH
Audra:
DAMN, THATâS SOME SNEAKY INSULTING
SKIP THE EMOTIONAL JUDO
I AM THE B. KNOWLES-CARTER OF KUDOS
Rebecca:
IâM THE LEBRON JAMES OF ACCLAIM
Audra:
THEN YOU MIGHT AS WELL CALL ME THE MICHELLE OF THE KVELL
Rebecca:
GO TO HELL
Audra & Rebecca:
THIS ISâŚ
Audra:
A JAP CHEER SCRIMMAGE
Audra & Rebecca:
LIKE A RAP BATTLE
Rebecca:
BUT THE MIRROR IMAGE
Audra & Rebecca:
BOTH OF USâLL FEEL GREAT
Audra:
WHEN WEâRE FINISHED
Rebecca:
GIVING A DOPE-SLAP OF DAP TO THIS JAPâŚ
Rebecca:
Which does stand for Jewish-American Princess, a term that, on one hand, does reinforce
negative, negative stereotypes about both Jews and women but, on the other hand, is a term
that we want to reclaim and own. Also, should acknowledge that me saying âdap to this japâ is
appropriative and a little problematic, if weâre being honest.
THIS IS TOUCHY STUFF AND ITâS PRETTY COMPLICATED
BUT I NOTICED THE DYNAMIC AND I THOUGHT THAT I SHOULD NAME IT
JUST LIKE I HATED YOU, BUT NOW I KINDA LIKE YOU
THIS SONGâS ANOTHER THING I CAN SEE TWO SIDES TO
Audra:
TERRIFIC SELF-AWARENESS
Rebecca:
KNOCK IT OFF, AUDRA!
YOU NEVER STOP, DO YOU?
Audra:
CANâT AND DONâT WANNA
Rebecca:
YOUâRE A WONDERFUL LADY,
BUT AN INSUFFERABLE BABY
Audra:
SHOULD WE MAKE OUT?
Rebecca:
WHAT?! NO!
...MAYBE
@TDCamper22
5 years ago
This should've been the endgame couple
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