@welcomedcompany1019

10 months ago

I was alone when I was 20. I had lost my adoptive mother (passed away) I was going to trade school to learn and decided to join the army. I had registered and had it all figured out. I had shown her family love. I had given my time to her daughter and brothers. Helping them out with everything. Moving, cleaning things their business. I had been told I no longer have a home. I was told to kick rocks. I had a blood brother who was at war at the time so he couldn’t help me. I was alone. I had a mental collapse at that moment. I had been a good kid, I helped everyone i had done so much good and my reward? Alone, the very people who I thought would have my back had abandoned me to my face. My own brother seemed to not be around for me. I got keys from a friend I made at the army while training. He gave me keys to an apartment that was abandoned. He had moved out and gave me the keys because he had 1 month on the lease and he whom joined the same time as me had the luck to leave in a week. I had to wait three months. I sat alone in the dark. I showered with cold water. I sat in complete darkness and slept on the floor. Noting no money no noting. I was a kid and I had never had guidance. I didn’t know how to go about life. I prayed to god I had meditated. Little ol me, the young bright eyed boy who thought everyone was family sitting alone in the dark. I was so mad so heart broken so (betrayed) that I cried, I hugged my knees together and I cried. A deep sad cry. No one came for me, no one came to help me. I was alone, no food nothing. I realized this world is evil this world is cruel. The people around you don’t matter when it comes to you* always put yourself first. I had learned that where ever I’ll go I’ll remember that I made it alone. I realized that you need darkness. You need to realize that smiling and agreeing to go with people that hate you can end in your death. That being agreeable and nice will lead you to lose things that are precious to you, like your time or your values. I taught myself to see people based on actions and to listen to my heart. Those that say they love you the most, those that say they’re your friends the most are verbally conditioning you. The true friends don’t say it the true family member doesn’t need to voice it. None the less I got myself out. How? I walked to a McDonald’s and talked to the manager. A manager who my friend knew. My friend had told me my situation. I had gotten a job a mile away from my dark room. I was so happy. I would get dressed in the dark. I’d look myself in the mirror and would tell myself, don’t worry you’ll do great. I smiled and flexed and showed my muscles and said hey I got grit and I got heart. I stood taller now that I had a job. I used my money to get a phone. I contacted some friends and I started to hang out with them. I went home at what ever time because I was homeless so it didn’t matter right? No, I went home at 10. I kept a focused mind. I had to work the next day I had responsibilities. I called and asked for food stamps and told them I was homeless and gave them a friends address for the food stamps. I had solved two problems within a week. I had one thing, someone that stood by my side. I never felt alone. God made it so that everything I touched it turned into gold. I had such luck. Everything went my way. My friends found out about me and one of them had a dad who was in the army. He was like what this kid is homeless, working 40 hours a week, has food stamps and he is alone? He told me to come stay with them until I left to the army. He would take me to work and pick me up and take me to training. My friend gave me his bed. He let me sleep on his bed. I hugged him and cried and everything I felt so grateful. I left to the army shortly after. I got on my feet and of course maintained contact with them. I left my food stamps card so they could buy what ever food they wanted. I learned a lot more through out my life. I learned that no matter how good of a person horrible things can still happen to you. I learned that good or bad has no face. The most beautiful and happy people can back stab you same with ugly people. In this life there is no discretion. You need to be selfish and plan things. Always look for options and what will put you in a situation that’s undesirable is lack of money. With money you’ll be able to do things. You’ll be valuable to people. I was given a house to sleep in and I had the utmost respect. That family is forever blessed. I love them forever. I’m thankful and grateful. Pray to god as well. Tell him your problems and ask him for help when you need it. I found money on the floor during those times. I also meditated and didn’t fap. As men we have the energy to ATTRACT but it comes with semen retention. People will want you to be around them and you will have energy to multi task. Deep down I wanted to hate everyone and become a criminal but I hugged myself and told myself that it’s not my fault. I had spread noting but love and eventually it will come my way. Karma is a thing and every now and than you’ll receive luck to such an extent that you go wow this worked out. There will also be moments where things go wrong where you will make mistakes and you’ll have to forgive yourself. I learned to love my shadow and I realized that you need both light and darkness in yourself in order to address a situation. Tell people no and leave those who fk you over. Slowly stop talking to people you realize don’t have your best interest. People will always tell you things but don’t listen to them. Most often than not people will spill lies from their mouth because it’s convenient to them at the time. Trust only yourself and make moves that will benefit yourself. Take a job that’s easy to do and easy to get too. Don’t share bank accounts with no one, Ever. Be smart about what you do.

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