Welcoem to posts!!
in the future - u will be able to do some more stuff here,,,!! like pat catgirl- i mean um yeah... for now u can only see others's posts :c
I need help naming this super hero, she swooped in and saved me from myself. She wanted no payment except some cheese and a scratch behind her ears. IDEAS:
1. CHORRO - cheesy Zorro
2. Lactose Lad
3. Whey Bae
4. Pawmesan Prowler
5. Lord Cheddarfury, the guardian of the melt
6. CURD
7.. The Dairy Dingleberry
Got any others?
1.2K - 98
Letâs play a game, can you guess which pic is a borzoi with a mammoth carrot on its head and which is a Parasaurolophus. FUN FACT: The Parasaurolophusâs crest that was used to make sounds to communicate with other members of its herd. The crest could make a b-flat sound - my question is, who was the ballsy mofo who picked up that fatty ahh tube fossil and started playing beethovenâs symphony no. 4 in b flat. You just know these lizards be honking at each other all the time, while fighting, doing the vertical mambo (I doubt they laid down), dancing - thereâs a reason they were eaten so often and itâs cause they were annoying. Like sugar rush kid with a kazoo annoying. Like the jealous woman at baby shower with new yearâs whistle. Or like a guy on crĂ ck trying to play the Didgeridoo.
3.1K - 38
I know the dubious tendrils of holiday capitalism are probing your every weakness right now, but if you have a snoot lover in your family please consider some of our questionably designed but reasonably priced merchandise. I think this mug is my favorite, actually I know it is - they say donât play favorites but I do. All proceeds go to the âSad Horses Enjoy Energy Treats Fund Unitedâ or SHEETFU for short. Links are on profile. Make a sad horse happy today with energy treats.
2.5K - 33
You spend 3-8% of your waking hours with your eyes closed- mostly because of blinking. What happens in this time is what concerns me. Reality renders. Atoms split. Borzois unfurl and refurl (not a word but should be) their extra appendages. One could assume that dogs experience their lives 7 times faster than us, so a blink is 3 full seconds of shenanigans; in three seconds 12 babies are born, billionaires earn 700+ dollars, you can make a life changing decision or even fall in love. A borzoi can circumvent the world in 3 seconds. Most do. Others have a game of chess, or sniff every inch of your skin. Thatâs how they stay ahead of you, seemingly know your thoughts before you have them. They manipulate you in your blinks, making you think of how generous you are with your coagulated milk products.
2.1K - 51
SNOOT ADORNMENTS VERSION 2
1. Embroidered snoot doily
2. Lacy and racy
3. Graffiti - colorful
4. Graffiti - Simple
5. War Paint
3.4K - 62
Due to Daylight SAVING time the stream today might be different for you (here in AZ we donât change). Itâll be 9:30AM MST which is now 8:30AM PST. I hate math and the whole concept of this outdated protocol.
2.3K - 28
CALEN PARKIN always wanted to pilot an AT-AT besides being severely nearsighted and afraid of heights and trees. Today was his first day. âFIRE!â He screeched, the gunner gave him a worried look. BANG. Another shot rang out from the heavy cannon, scorching trees and grass alike. âItâs a miss, sirâ the gunner said sinking into his black pleather chair. âDAMN EWOKS!!â Calen ground his gloved fist into the dashboard, as small heat signals dispersed into the forest on the monitor. âI should have stayed on the farm, listened to my old man and whelped Tookas, I was good at that.â LURCH. Alarms rang out as the AT-AT STALLED and began to lie down? What in the rings of Minfar was happening!? Calen exited the vehicle on the forest floor. It appeared to be writhing in pain, chunking up huge piles dirt with its gargantuan foot pads. âItâs possessed!â Cried a stormtrooper, as Calen took off his glove and rested it on the giant metal abdomen. His eyes widened. âGET ME SOME ENGINE LUBRICANT.â His confused gunner did as he said. Calen spent 3 hours with the beast, and through a cacophony of screeching metal and bursting rubber, he helped give birth to 9 infant AT-ATs. He sat in a pile of gasoline and broken parts holding the cooing gray baby. âYou made it boy, youâre okâŚ. Theyâre alive, I never knew they were alive.â
2.9K - 30
I had a dream that I was designing a borzoi in a Balderâs Gate style character customization screen. It was obvious that I had recreated Ora, but at the end of the options was a âSnoot Adornment.â I spent some time flipping through them then I woke up- I tried to recreate as many of the things I saw (Iâm sure itâs not dream perfect). They all had weird names too, like âCrop Circlesâ and âAncient One.â I wish I remembered them all.
5.3K - 80
Most mornings Iâll find Vlooby in the living room sitting like a periscope with his s-foils locked in attack position. In this way he sort of looks like a bear? Itâs obvious that something in the yard interests him- enough to activate his upper half while his lower remains in repose. Truly there are only a few things that get him up with any sort of urgency (excluding the calls of nature): morning snoot pets, Trader Joeâs smoked chicken treats, and his mortal enemy - skunks. Everything else must be inspected, via periscope, until the threat level can be assessed. I have a feeling, he just identifies whether or not the target is a skunk. I have no idea why he hates them so much. Their spray does nothing to stop him. Locked in. Luckily we have fewer skunks at this home, and we havenât had to give him a peroxide and DAWN bath in a few years.
2.8K - 49
SNORPLOCK HOLMES and the PHANTOM GOLFER
âOh my dear Dogtor Watson, canât you see the apparitionsâs apparent condition without contrition about the infliction of such wounds of whenever the malediction was uttered was just a distraction!â âWas it a twin,â replied Watson. âItâs Never a twin!â Snapped Snorplock, âthe only person who had any real motivation to destroy those bushes was⌠The Admiral!â âThe War hero!? But why!â Snorplock paced, a Cheshire grin curling around his snoot - which took quite a minute. âErythroxylum coca,â he finally said. Watson puzzled, â a coke plant? He set up this whole scheme and murdered sweet old Mrs. Cook for a coke plant. It makes no sense!â â SURE IT DOES, look around,â said SNORP with a flourish âHis hip was mutilated from the war, pain medications are heavily regulated now and he had to seek a new source of relief, but it was beneath him to seek out any dubious means, so he aimed to destroy Mrs. Cookâs plants by defecating them to death and replacing them with coca. So he hired a mime from the local theater to dress as a ghost, he never intended for Mrs. Cook to have a heart attack!â âAnd why golf?â Asked Watson. âThe admiralâs favorite sport, seems he too is not without a sense of DRAMA.â Snorplock turned, the Admiral walked up, clapping (somehow, thatâs hard with paws) his snoot gun draw and cocked. âBravo, Mr. Holmes,â he snorted.
2.9K - 28
LIVE STREAM EVERY SUNDAY 9:30AM MST!!!
(check community tab or Discord for up to date schedules!)
OG Vine. Daytime screenwriter/actor. Nighttime hose goat (borzoi) farmer.
Channel dedicated to the Borzoi dog breed and home of the late Esper, "My little Russian Lady."