Space aliens force me to think I am out of my apartment when I am in fact IN my apartment. Probably sleeping or watching television. To combat this I have taken to shooting myself almost constantly with a camcorder to prove where I am and what I do. It is a tedious job to shoot my entire life and monitor it at night (when I used to watch the evening news), so I often act like a newsman so that when I have to watch my 'daily tape' it seems more like a normal show on television. The space aliens from outer space have devious ways of splitting my brain into parts to gentrify my soul, but they will not fool me because I have television with me all the time. I will survive by shooting myself. --Rik Arithmetic (not real name/an Alias)