Born to a nomadic nerfherder off the coast of Iowa and raised by circus clowns. Schooled in the arts of bussing tables, drinking alcohol and pontificating. Not the most interesting man in the world but probably the loudest man at your table. A big believer that a smirk and a frown will keep people from asking you for directions and loose change. Once jumped into a hotel swimming pool fully clothed and was rescued from drowning by his father.