@CharlieCushing

1 month ago

I very much needed to hear this. I've been floundering for a week as I have no one to reflect with. I like to think of the experience as "traumatizing", assuming that trauma doesn't necessarily need to have solely negative connotations. Totality is ludicrously far outside the boundaries of what's considered to be a "normal" human experience. You learn a lot of things. There are many profound moments of spontaneous understanding flooding into your head all at once. The overload of piercing visual impact, sounds, smells, new knowledge, fear, observations about the people around you and their change in behavior, the feeling of being singled out, etc. There's far too much to process. There's a kind of distorted memory I now associate with total eclipses; Like there was a shock to my psyche that's taking a long time to unpack. I associate that with trauma, but in a mostly positive way in this case. Exploring your memories of the event over the following years may be really fascinating for you. I remember my first time in 2017 - seeing the corona, the sunset effect, the animals freaking out, the people freaking out, that little kid's brilliant red jacket, where the bathroom was...all those little details about the experience as a whole make one hell of a memory. Eventually it got a little hard for me to remember the details, and even what the corona looked like at times. Photos can't really capture the visual impact it has, so I kind of have to keep the visual memory alive by working at it. Look up helikopter_noah on Instagram sometime! He created an image that's probably the best representation of what I saw with the naked eye on Monday. I'm going to rely on it if I ever need to refresh my memory :) This is my second total eclipse. Seeing it for the second time was potentially more impactful than how I felt after the first one, I haven't decided yet. The difference was very interesting for me. This time, I hustled more during the leadup to totality, making sure other people would have a smooth experience and not miss anything. That part can be really fun. No cameras meant a completely front-row seat. Overall, the second one was enjoyable because I knew vaguely what to expect, and that other people would appreciate it like I did the first time. Watching them react was almost as cool as seeing the corona again. I sincerely hope you see at least one more. Welcome, fellow eclipse chaser.

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