@lylahh

1 year ago

this song reminds me of i had a friend throughout this year named joshua but i called him josh. we met in february and were friends up until july/august. when we met i didn’t really like him because he was very first intimidating and always gave me a rude look, he also never bothered talking to me. we shared a few mutual friends and our friend groups eventually collided or merged. whenever we hung out with our friends we stayed as far as we could from eachother just because we both had very different vibes and weren’t 2 people you think would be friends. as time passed we started talking not just with friends but even in school because we had 6 classes together. we were juniors this year btw. there were a few classes that year where we sat near eachother so once we started talking we took that advantage. i think the main reason we finally decided to talk to eachother was because we accepted that we would have to be friends because he were generally around eachother so much. as i said before we were totally different people but once the two of us got to know one another we actually had so much in common and we had very similar interests and experiences through our lives. in the classes where we didn’t sit that close too eachother in, he made his way as close to my seat as possible. we connected very well and became super close super fast. i think it’s safe to say that i could have called him my best friend throughout april-june. he and i always had something to talk about and most of the time it was something stupid that made me laugh historically. his sense of humor was just insane, like he always knew how to make someone laugh and he genuinely had a funny way of seeing everything. i definitely realized throughout our friendship that i was started to think of him as more than just my best friend, i knew i was falling in love with him but i was never ever going to say anything about it to him because i couldn’t and wouldn’t ruin something i never had with anyone else. in early june he introduced me to a friend he had who we called T. T was very clingy to him and wasn’t always the nicest to me but i liked her, she was fun and crazy. I was never under the impression that she liked me st all though. after she met me she was seriously doing everything with josh and was nearly always with him or by his side. of course it bothered me because i never got to spend time with him in my own and i was jealous of her. josh eventually got pretty distant with all of our friends and then he got distant with me. In the last week or so of june be and T announced that they were dating, I was very supportive of it all but of course I didn’t want to speak out loud about how i actually felt about the whole thing. josh and i pretty much faded away during that whole process mainly because of T. I’m not sure i would even call us friends anymore because we haven’t talked seriously in 3 months. I’ll give him the time he needs though. this school year we only have 2 classes together but in both T seats just near him. honestly, i can see how unhappy he looks around her, hes looked at me and i’ve seen how uncomfortable and forced their relationship is. everyday i think about the old him and miss him endlessly. may update this but thanks for reading, let me know about what you guys think on this situation.

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