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Mystery text : aWh6RGpyeEpXcmcgaSAgbG92ICB1IGV1LXByb3h5LnBva2V0dWJlLmZ1bg==
143 : true
2,143,989 Views • Aug 9, 2024 • Click to toggle off description
Views : 2,143,989
Genre: People & Blogs
License: Standard YouTube License
Uploaded At Aug 9, 2024 ^^
warning: returnyoutubedislikes may not be accurate, this is just an estiment ehe :3
Rating : 4.897 (3,361/127,505 LTDR)
97.43% of the users lieked the video!!
2.57% of the users dislieked the video!!
User score: 96.15- Overwhelmingly Positive
RYD date created : 2024-11-20T20:06:42.1926Z
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1,510 Comments
Top Comments of this video!! :3
My boyfriend recently told me that his parents told him how he felt so often that he never learned to assess them on his own and now he has so much trouble getting in tune with his feelings and expressing himself. I thought the empathy when he started crying was so sweet and firm at the same time
7.2K |
This is a PERFECT redirect. He wants to play in the water, so he gets in the bath. Its kinda like a compromise
17K |
I like the sign language! It makes it so much easier to communicate with nonverbal kids.
7.6K |
Don't ask yes/no questions if you're not accepting his answer. This makes him feel like his choices are not valid. Instead say - i know you wanted to wash more dishes and your frustrated now. But we're all done and we're taking a bath now. Do you want to choose a bath toy/bath bomb,.. don't ask questions if there is no choice!
4.1K |
I don't feel like youre really listening to him if he says "more" and you don't respond to that or he says he doesn't want to do something and you just say "yes" back. The firmness but gentleness with the boundary is great, but for myself, if my toddler says "I don't want a bath" my response is usually something like "I hear you. You want to keep playing. But it's bath time now. I've got to get you clean so you stay healthy." And then just let them cry about it if they want to.
1K |
Don't ask questions if you aren't going to listen to their answer. Completly diregarding them is rude. Can totally reframe all these as directed instructions or if you must ask questions as ones wherd it doesn't matter the answer. "Eg, do you wanna wash this dish or this dish?" "Washing dishes is over. Time for a bath. Do you want to want bubbles or no bubbles?"
332 |
i wouldnt use questions with kids if their answers are just compeltely ignored.
''do you want to do this?'' ''no i dont!'' ''yes you do :)''
do you see how that doesnt really work?
of course they still have to do the thing, but you need to tell him that instead of telling him he actually does want to do the thing when he doesnt
450 |
Telling him "it's bathtime - yes" isn't "understanding and empathy" as she labeled it. Empathy would be, "I understand you're feeling frustrated because you want to do more dishes. The dishes are all done but there's more water playtime in the bath!"
343 |
I'm not quite sure what the point of asking questions is if the answer doesn't matter at all. The entire video is basically "Do you want to do the dishes? - No. - Yes! 😊 Now do you want to do something else? - No!! - Yess! 🤩😍 Do you want to play in the water now? - No! 😭😭 - Oh my god, is that a YESSSS?? 🥰🥰"
I might be wrong and I don't have children so I can't really judge, but something doesn't sound righ
400 |
I'm not a fan of the "want to?" Approach. The child DOESN'T want to, and that's okay. Sometimes we have to do things we don't want to do. Responding to his no with a yes is just ignoring his words and pushing him to give the response mom wants to hear.
In situations like this, I like to try and carry something of the preferred activity to the necessary activity.
It's time for a bath - lets go make soap bubbles in the bath like we have in the sink. Do you want to pick one dish to bring with you to wash in the bathtub? If you have a spare sponge, bring that and make it a bath toy sponge.
If he's still saying no, I'd say "I'm hearing that you don't want to take a bath right now. You have to take a bath so you can be clean, but after you're all done with the bath you can pick something to do. After your bath, should we read a book, or play with your trains?" You can validate their words/feelings and still affirm what needs to happen.
572 |
Yes to all of it, that was well done! but saying Yes to a No is not a positive reframing, that's just contradicting. Positive reframing means finding the good in difficult situations.
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Get practiced in NOT saying “ok?” at the end of directives. It’s asking their permission to follow directions. Also, it leaves an opening for the child to say “no”, just like this one did. Not saying kids shouldn’t have the option to say “no”, but if there truly isn’t the option at a given time, let directives be firm.
68 |
"Do you want to go take a bath with mom?"
"No."
"Yes..."
I can see you're doing a good job at staying calm, sign posting, repeating important phrases like "a done washing dishes" but gurl. Don't act like you're listening to them when you're not. He's going to have a meltdown if you look at him with a big smile and completely disregard the answer he just gave to a question you asked. Tell him what you're doing next and ask if he thinks it sounds fun, but don't ask him what he wants and then say "oh well I'll pretend you gave the answer I wanted"
543 |
I like that you sign “Finished” to also show him you’re all done. ASL is so important 🤟
530 |
I don't know how I feel about teaching a child that you're gonna take their "No" as "Yes"... I feel like that could set up for some issues with boundaries and consent later on.
456 |
Omg I remember hating when my grandmother would ask me a question only to fully disregard my answer for her own. Why ask then?? You clearly don’t care what I answer anyway
75 |
There’s no actual empathy or understanding displayed here, but the redirection and firmness were done well.
203 |
This is fantastic! But when you asked “do you want to take a bath?”, I’m wondering if that was confusing or frustrating since it wasn’t actually a choice. I can imagine how I would feel if someone asked me if I wanted to do something, I told them no, and then they said “yes”. That where you could maybe say “you can choose 2 toys to put in the bath” or something to that effect. Since that’s something he actually does have control over!
169 |
Another mother in a Mom's group I grequented suggested agreeing with the toddler who wanted to do or have something which was impractical at the moment. She told me to "give it to them in a wish re-direct to a new sctivity. Example: my young son doesnt want to leave the playground. I say, "I wish I could let you stay here as long as you want! You could swing some more and go on the slide! But we have to get home and make dinner. Will you help me tear salad leaves? You do a good job st that.". My memory is that acknowledgement of what they wanted in theoment, then redirecting to a future activity was effective 75% of the time. So IMO worth the extra effort.
16 |
@CrowandRaven
3 months ago
It’s pretty hilarious that he will still go along with what he’s being directed to do even when saying no. Thanks for making gentle parenting a respectable method for raising kids.
26K |