A song about learning to love sentence diagramming. Parodied from "Rude" by Magic.

Lyrics by Mrs. Doane and Miss Martorana
Diagramming looks really bland, and prob’ly confusing
Lines and words drawn but they make no sense
It makes me feel stupid
I hate to do this, but I have no choice
I don’t wanna fail class
So I grab a pencil and start to draw

How’m I spos’d to figure out the functions of these words?
(Tell me, please!)
'Cause I need to know
You say I'll never understand it ‘til I map it out
It’s simple though, when you break it all down

Make a diagram or two
Once you learn just what to do
with all the words in a sentence
You gotta diagram all of it
(Diagram it) Diagram subjects!
(Diagram it) Diagram predicates!
(Diagram it) Diagram objects!
Make a diagram or….. twooooo

I drew my base line, added the subject and the predicate
Let modifiers hang off the bottom, like they’re supposed to do

And it makes lots of sense!
The adjectives, they go under the nouns
Conjunctions conjoin the words
There’s a place for every word to go

Can I diagram all of these sentences right?
I think I can, but I need to know
all the sentence parts or I might make a mistake
That’s why I need to do it in pencil

Make a diagram or two
Once you learn just what to do
with all the words in a sentence
You gotta diagram all of it
(Diagram it) Diagram modifiers
(Diagram it) Diagram appositives
(Diagram it) Diagram sentences
Make a diagram or…. twooooo

Di-a-gram…

Musical interlude

Diagramming’s easy when you know the sentence parts
(So learn them now)
'Cause you need to know
Subjects, objects, predicates and modifiers
It all makes sense, when you put them together.

Make a diagram or two
Once you learn just what to do
with all the words in a sentence
You gotta diagram all of it
(Diagram it) Diagram subjects!
(Diagram it) Diagram predicates!
(Diagram it) Diagram objects!
Make a diagram or…... twooooooo
Cuz you know just what to do Oooo
Make a diagram or two