@The_Last_Stormtrooper

2 months ago

Please pray for me guys because I think I might be losing my Spiritual warfares. It feels like I don't love God, and I sometimes don't want to pray, read the Bible, and go to Church. It feels like the Holy Spirit has left me, and every time I try to not think about all this, I just feel guilty. It's breaking my heart, but it feels like I don't care. Like I don't want this Christian life. I want to be for Jesus again, full of His perfect love, and Holy Spirit, but I fear that I have, or am very close to hardening my heart. I just want this all to finish, because it's been lasting for like 4 or 5 months now. I'm so mad at myself, because I could've come to God immeadiatly, just like Peter did, but I didn't. I have so little faith. I'm sorry God, I don't deserve you. I fear it might be too late for me. I feel like I've ruined my relationship with God so much, that it will never be the same again, just like Adam and Eve did. I'm disappointed in myself, because I thought that I'm going tk be there for God my whole life, but I've failed Him. I love Him, but my love feels weak. I believe in Him, but my belief feels weak. Whenever I now read inspirational quotes in the Bible, or hear them, I dont feel moved. I've ruined myself, and I just can't believe that I let the enemy win. I know God has forgiven me, but I don't know if I have forgiven myself. I'm always being hard on myself about it, always condemning myself. I feel like I deserve a punishment, because God has done so much for me, loves me so much, and I've let Him down so much.

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