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16,880 Views • 3 years ago • Click to toggle off description
Originally posted: 8/22/2022
Life’s gonna be tough if you only apologize when you feel it. 🤷♀️
Transcription:
I believe in making little kids say they're sorry. Some people are like you shouldn't force kids to apologize, but why? I'm no parenting expert, but that's okay, because neither are you, probably, unless you have a doctorate. Lots of us have had a few kids. Doesn't make us experts. This is just my opinion. Saying you're sorry is not about being sorry. It's about acting.
If you want to be overly negative, it's a lie, but more reasonably it's social grace, which is an important thing to have. You say, thank you in situations where you don't really mean it. It's the exact same thing with apologizing. There are times when an apology is the most appropriate response, regardless of your feelings.
We all got to get along in society, and that involves a certain dance, playing by the script. Playing by the script? I don't think that's a phrase. Following the script. Playing by the rules. And apologizing is part of that. Come along for more unfounded parenting opinions.
#parenting #sayyouresorry #sorry #apologize #parentsoftiktok #notanexpert
Views : 16,880
Genre: People & Blogs
License: Standard YouTube License
Uploaded At 3 years ago ^^
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RYD date created : 2024-04-02T13:15:09.873961Z
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118 Comments
Top Comments of this video!! :3
It teaches kids how to make up after a disagreement and quite honestly the foundation towards better chances of a more successful marriage later. Apologizing for hurting someones feeling or acting wrong is such keystone in marriage too.
52 | 0
It's a testament to the state of society when having to endorse teaching your children to apologise is a thing.
| 0
Hi! Actual parenting expert here. First off, no I'm not perfect, and fail plenty as a parent.
Secondly, stats show forcing a child to say sorry is unhelpful. However, regularly prompting prosocial behaviour is SUPER effective; ie "if you say sorry, it can help them feel better"
5 | 2
Teaching kids empathy is much better than just forcing them to be insincere because they don’t know or care why what they did/said was wrong or hurtful, an apology that isn’t genuine means nothing and if someone doesn’t want to apologize they shouldn’t it just shows what kind of person they are and at least they aren’t going around pretending to have remorse and empathy when they don’t
1 | 0
A kid who realized they hurt someone and who feels bad about that will want to say they're sorry.
A kid who is forced to apologize in front of an adult for intentionally hurting someone they want to bully juuuust may come back loaded for bear, when the adults aren't looking.
So, sometimes there's got to be something other than Saying Sorry, to protect victims from becoming an even more tempting target.
1 | 0
The day you need your adult kid to say sorry to you for what they did, you'll regret not teaching them to say it.
| 0
Kids need to be taught that its ok to be wrong. Admiting when we're wrong is about being a mature adult. Simple
| 0
It's the first step in teaching empathy and remorse. Sometimes you have to have the words first in order to experience or process the emotion. We teach little kids the words and eventually they really do feel sorry when they wrong someone.
59 | 0
Helping a child to understand the value of apologizing... 👍🏻 Helping them to take accountability for their actions, make reparations, prevent further conflict, etc... 👍🏻
Gold standard: When you see that you've made a mistake in something, apologize to them, or let them see you apologize to someone else. That teaches far more powerfully than anything they're 'made to do.' And it shows them HOW to do it... and that doing so is not a weakness, but a stren
1 | 0
no one is born with knowledge. It's what we're taught and apologizing is grsce.
1 | 0
I think the same, the words: Thanks, thank you, sorry and please, does not mean that you feel it, but that can make your day a little bit easier
| 0
It's not just "acting" as a social grace, it's an opportunity to teach empathy, and when unable to feel empathy, compassion. It's become harder to instill these things in our children because they form connections with screens and remote social skills earlier in life. This breeds self-centered thinking and without social consequences, these behaviors are not as socially enforced early in life. We also place less value on face-to-face social engagement as a society, as demonstrated by ever-decreasing outdoor living spaces.
| 0
Yes! I went to primary and middle school in the UK and the skill I am most grateful to have learned is social grace. The British have that down PAT, and it boggles my mind when people over here don’t seem to get it. “We live in a society!”
| 0
I think it's important to not only teach kids to apologise, but to think and understand what it is they are apologising for. A simple "I'm sorry" to get out of trouble ain't gonna cut it. You NEED to do better next time, so you NEED to understand why you're apologising now.
1 | 0
I'm Canadian and we're famous for saying "sorry". It's absolutely about the interaction and social grace. It smooths sooo many social bumps.
| 0
Well, you know how it is the Midwest and Ontario…you tell the ottoman “sorry” after tripping over it.
1 | 0
This video summarises my frustration about interacting with neurotypicals perfectly. (Having to say sorry or thank you despite not meaning it)
3 | 1
Acknowledging the hurt. = not ignoring or gaslighting. Healthy to apologise
3 | 0
It's important to teach your children that they are responsible for their actions regardless of how they feel.
| 0
@seashoree1
3 years ago
"Apologizing does not always mean you're wrong and the other person is right. It just means you value your relationship more than your ego"
141 | 3